I’m sure by now you’ve been inundated with YEAR END posts. It’s coming! The end of 2019! And the start of not only a new year but a new DECADE!
What do you want it be BRING you?
What do you want it to TAKE AWAY?
What NEW HABIT will you form?
What OLD HABIT will you drop?
What NEW VISION will you call forth?
What INNER SUPER POWER will you harness?
What NEW CAPE will you don??
What are you ready to say YES to??
What will you finally say NO to??
OKAY OKAY CAN’T A GAL JUST SIP HER COFFEE IN PEACE?
Actually, I’m FULLY involved in all of the above–taking stock, taking heart, taking notes, taking a fresh look inside to see what it is I REALLY want to create for myself.
I have my systems (I LOVE SYSTEMS!). I have my Commit30 planner, my Goal Tracker sheet, my laminated list of daily activities that matter to me, my new #365 challenge. I’m excited about it all.
But not because it’s going to make me okay. I’m already okay (as are you) right NOW as I sit on the couch writing this.
None of my systems are going to turn me into a more worthwhile person.
I’m worthwhile just because I am. Worthiness comes with the bod pod. If you are currently inhabiting a body, you are worthwhile. Period.
But I will say this–
We are all here to bring ourselves to the world, however large or small our worlds are.
We are here now. We will never be here again.
We are here to evolve.
We are here to contribute.
January 1st, 2020 is about to happen. It’s an arbitrary marker but it can be useful. It can be a reset. Not a DO OR DIE DATE. Not as a way to set ourselves up to fail and therefore cement the notion that we are doomed and fatally flawed and why even bother…
January 1st can be a fresh page in the typewriter.
Yes. It’s not completely blank. It comes with a history, a backstory. Things happened. He hurt you. She let you down. Opportunities came and left and you weren’t able (FOR WHATEVER REASON) to reach out and grab them, or hold on or stick with them.
It didn’t turn out the way you hoped or thought it might or were promised it would.
I GET IT.
All of that is true.
It is also only part of the story.
Think of it like words written in invisible ink. They are there, but it’s also possible to write new words on the very same page.
I’m not being a pollyanna.
I’m being a possibilitarian.
The best part? You don’t have to be ready or confident or clear or focused or steady.
You can be not ready and insecure and foggy and scattered and quaking in your boots. (Those words just correspond to feeling states which are actually molecules moving at different speeds in your body!)
Try loving it. It means you are alive. One day you will not be and when that day comes, you will feel no things. Eek. I prefer stage fright to no things. Don’t you?
Love it like this: Say, I’m lost and I love that.
I’m scared and I love that.
I’m heartbroken and I love that.
I’m out of ideas and I love that.
I’m fat and I love that.
I’m furious and I love that.
I feel nothing and I love that.
Love that blank/not blank piece of paper.
Crank it into the typewriter.
It’s sort of exciting, right?
What if everything that happened has led you to this moment? I mean, it has. It (whatever it was) happened. And now it is this moment.
(By the way, I think it’s important to say that I am NOT an “everything happens for a reason” sort of a gal. I am a ‘freedom is possible no matter what shit has hit the fan” sort of a gal.
What if now is the time for you to step closer to your own personal freedom?
What if now is the time for you to be truly, deeply, and unabashedly you?
What if you’re ready, even if you don’t feel ready?
What if your version of ready feels PROFOUNDLY UNREADY?
What if you can go into this new year with full permission to bring ALL YOUR HUMANITY–your fear, doubt, grief, confusion, hurt, hope, love, envy, rage, beauty, yearning, joy, power, grit, weakness, brilliance, inspiration, determination, apathy, your fuck-ups, your badassery, your WONDER.
That’s a story I want to read!
Lastly, THANK YOU.
Thank you, Dear Reader, for reading. Thank you for being part of my community. I hope that you’ll stick with me in 2020 as I have some new things percolating. But if you don’t, know that you being here has mattered to me. I am grateful. 🙂