Body CompassCommunityMindsetSelf-careThe TAO of You

It’s not you…

Your time is precious.

Don’t waste it on someone who doesn’t realize you are, too. 


In whose company do you feel seen, valued, appreciated, even flat-out adored?

In whose company do you feel out of sorts, off-kilter, as if there is static in the air?

In whose company do you feel ease?

In whose company do you feel effort?

In whose company do you feel reciprocity, the back and forth of a two-way street, that things are not rigidly EVEN STEVEN but that, over time, there is a give and take, an extension of interest, genuine warmth and curiosity in you, your life, your work, your family?

Listen: what other people think about me is none of my business. What IS my business is putting myself in the company of people that make me feel good.

It’s all about the body. When my body feels icky, when my shoulders feel tight, when my mouths pulls back at the edges, something is off. I could go into my mind, into a whole STORY about the other person and what they’re thinking or believing, but what will that do for me?

And ultimately? It really doesn’t have anything to do with me. It’s about them.

I know someone who likes to say, I’m too magical for their bullshit.


If my side of the street is clean, I don’t need to stare at their side of the street, trying to make sense of the mess.

That be their mess.

If they want my help with it, they are welcome to ask. I am up for the hard conversation. I’ll roll up my sleeves and sort through all kinds of debris. But until or unless they do?

Girl, bye.

I do not have the time.

My soul is calling me to go where my big, beautiful, messy, unabashedly glorious and imperfect self is celebrated.

Do you relate? If so, I say, GO! Your soul awaits!

Call up an old friend and have them shower you with love.

Or take a bath, a walk, a bounce on the mini-trampoline. Make a cup of Bengal Spice tea with heavy cream and sit on the stoop and watch the world go by.

Read, paint, doodle, dig your fingers into the ground.

Dive into the salty waves. Crank your favorite song and boogie all over the house. Curl up on the couch and watch a movie.

You’ll come back to yourself, I promise, and you, dear reader, are the best company there is.

2 thoughts on “It’s not you…

  1. This piece comes at a time of deep hurt and loss and loneliness in my life. Amazing how the Universe watches out for us and sprinkles a bit of glitter or some rose petals on the hard, ashen remains of our charred and scarred souls, just at that moment when we feel utterly wasted away. Sometimes words are the glittered gift or rose petals of soft love we need.

    1. I totally hear you! And I’m so heartened to hear that these words help ease some pain. Sending xxx to you!

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